Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Crash and burn



The embers crack and sizzle as they slowly die out in the fire that was my self-assurance. Once a towering inferno, dancing and boasting a strength and resolve unmatched and untouchable, it now sits, a lifeless mass of dirt and ash.

I’m scared.

I feel like a lump of coal being crushed and trying to hold up over a lifetime of dark solitude underground. Though the end result may be beauty. I’m beginning to question if the end is worth the means.

I’ve found a new game. I walk across campus with someone I’ve never met. It’s usually a beautiful woman or someone out of my league. I act like we’re in a fight and because of which we aren’t talking. I find it astounding that you can walk half a mile with someone and have them not even acknowledge you exist.

I’m beginning to thrive on that. The reticence has become my sanctuary.

3 comments:

Sara said...

attending a huge university along with thousands of other young adults in which little to no one knows you exist or even cares...
probably would do this to you.

overwhelming to say the least. its a huge change from highschool where your world is only limited to a couple hundred kids.

big world.
a big world for you to do big things.

don't be afraid of the mass unknown.
its opportunity at its greatest.

miss ya!

thesexyswede said...

...I might have to do that one day.

by the by I changed my url it's thecatdiedhappy.blogspot.com

I lovest you

Shexpeare said...

I should do that sometime.